Eight DO"s and DONT"s for surviving the in-law wars

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We all love home, but when being a daughter, you get married leave your home and move into your husband"s home. Sometimes you stay with the in-laws and some stay on their own. Either way surviving the in-law wars needs to be contained. 

Married or not married this is important. Marriage is never a bed of roses especially when the honeymoon phase is over. Then reality just kicked in...and then you ask yourself "Is this what I signed up for??"... hahaha. You are now in it, and how do you make this work?


Here are my Eight DOs and DONTs for surviving the in-law wars


#1  DO prioritize

Your partner and your marriage are your top priority. Protect your marriage.

#2 DO set boundaries

You and your spouse must clearly define the boundaries of your marriage. This means deciding who comes in, when, and under what circumstances.  You promised to forsake all others. 

#3 DO figure out holidays upfront

As early as possible, decide how you want to spend holidays and other important occasions as a couple.  Do not just go along and hope you can change it later.

#4 DO be a team

Recognize you cannot change his family’s behavior, only your response to it. Have a clear and united response that supports your marriage.

#5 DO keep an open mind

Listen to your partner’s viewpoint and feelings about his family with an open mind and heart. 

#6 DON’T betray your spouse to your parents

Be clear about what is okay to share about your marriage with your parents.  Do not betray your spouse’s confidences or vulnerabilities.  Make sure you tell them about the positive aspects of your spouse and marriage.

#7 DON’T force the relationship

If you cannot reconcile your partner and his parents, stop trying.

#8 DO be the bad cop

You are the spokesman and enforcer for your marriage to your parents. Do not leave it to your partner to work things out with your parents. Let their relationship be as easy as possible.

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